


For I Am Not the One

by oreamilkshake



Category: STVF, Seduce the villain's father, 악당의 아빠를 꼬셔라 | Seduce the Villain's Father (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst, Blame Ice, F/M, Happy Ending?, I was forced to do this, Merry Christmas, for the sake of 300 ffs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:27:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28290144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oreamilkshake/pseuds/oreamilkshake
Summary: As Yerenica contemplates what will now happen to her future, to her life, a song from her past life comes to her
Relationships: Yereninovica Lebovny/Erudian Belgoat
Comments: 2
Kudos: 28





	For I Am Not the One

**Author's Note:**

> This was entirely inspired by Sally's Song from Nightmare Before Christmas so go ahead and watch the movie, listen to the song, or even listen to the Korean version of it! It's so pretty and beautiful [insert sniff sounds]

Yerenica wasn’t able to sleep that night, not after the countless thoughts… no, not after what she heard earlier, not after the one thing that mattered most. Like weeks ago, when she was fearful of the nightmares, she didn’t want to sleep, afraid that a new day will come and with it, another day filled with nothing but pain and sadness.

_ And here I thought second lives were something to be happy about. _

She paused.

_ Well, I was happy… _

The memory of a warm hand larger than hers came to her mind and suddenly, being all alone in this balcony felt cold, despite the warm spring breeze of the night. Yerenica wrapped her cardigan closer to her body, cursing her stupidity when she noticed how thin and sheer it was.

She sighed.

Her eyes went downwards, the darkness surrounding the gardens brought back the images from the nightmare.

Pale, cold hands reaching out to grab her, dead people everywhere,

_ “Come with me, Eun-seo.” _

The fear, the feeling of being alone, the screams---

_ “Princess.” _

Yerenica stepped backwards and shuddered.

_ No, stop it. _ She bit her lower lip.  _ You’ve done what needed to be done. You’re going to the Temple, and then you’re going home. _

**_Do you really want to go home?_ **

Yerenica was quiet before she let out a mirthless laugh.

_ No. I don’t want to go back. _ She looked at the vast buildings of the Imperial Palace, the gardens which were now lit by small, yellow lamps, and the pink roses which glowed underneath the moonlight.  _ This is home… _

_ But…  _

_ “You’d better go back to Lebovny as soon as possible.” _

_ “If you’re not in front of me, I’ll be less worried.” _

_ “This place is never favourable to you.” _

Cold, kind words. Words that were like daggers into her heart each time she remembered them, she remembered the voice they belonged to. A voice filled with warmth that kept pushing her away.

_ It’s not for me. _

She stiffened. She remembered something, another pain. Back in her teenage days when she watched an old film with some of her friends. A song of sorrow, when you know you’re not the one, yet could not help but long to be.

Yerenica glanced nervously at her surroundings, aside from the night patrol guards who were far away, and Raulus, surely no one would hear her singing. 

She snorted.  _ How long has she last sung a song? Is Yereninovica’s voice good…? _ She slapped her hands on her face which suddenly heated up.  _ But, _ when she looked up at the lone moon she continued her thought,  _ it feels right to sing it. _

She took a deep breath. 

“ _ I sense there's something in the wind _

_ That feels like tragedy's at hand” _

Tragedy. What a perfect way to describe this situation of hers. She smiled ruefully at the thought.  _ How much time do I have left? _ Yerenica clutched her chest, feeling that phantom pain once again. She feared dying, however, if her death still meant that he would live on…

…  _ That’s good enough for me. _

_ “And though I'd like to stand by him _

_ Can't shake this feeling that I have” _

These stupid feelings. It was because of his handsome smile, his warm hands, his kind and sweet gestures, and his comforting embrace…

Tears brimmed at the corner of her eyes as she clutched her cardigan in a tight grip.

_ Why’s he to blame? It’s all my fault for being a fool. And now I’m stuck in this… stupid, unrequited love. _

She again sighed.

_ “The worst is just around the bend” _

Soleia Elard was still there, despite her being already an enemy to Erudian. Yerenica feared what would happen between them. A war? A battle? Elard controlled the Tower, and wielded more power than Rosel, that itself was a fact that she knew.

Still, Soleia wants to be empress despite the suspicions that Erudian has of her, and even if Erudian did not want to, he had no evidence against her. And just this afternoon,...

Yerenica’s lips trembled as a single tear went down her pale face. Her fingers clutched the railings of the balcony as her entire body trembled.

_ “And does he notice _

_ My feelings for him?” _

Does he know? If he did, why does he continue to hurt her? To protect her.

_ … Meanie. He’s always been mean to me…  _ Yerenica paused before amending…  _ No, he’s always been kind to me… _

In her previous life, she had crushes and first loves, but this was different, this was more, this was…

_ Not for me. _

_ “And will he see _

_ How much he means to me? _

_ I think it's not to be” _

She croaked at the last part and covered her mouth as more streams of tears came gushing down. She suddenly felt stupid.

_ Why are you weeping for something that wasn’t even yours in the first place? _

_ You’re going back to Lebovny, despite all these tears of yours. _

And she wondered, when she goes back, will he think of her? Will he remember her? Will he… miss her?

And when her time is up, even then, will he…?

_ “What will become of my dear friend? _

_ Where will his actions lead us then?” _

Every moment after this, if she has no more role to play, will now be up to him. Every choice they have made, every result of these choices, will lead to their own consequences. Yerenica just prayed that all she had done, despite how useless she was, wasn’t in vain. She prayed that even if she was far away, he would be safe, her sister will be safe, her husband, and Ferdi as well.

All the lives lost in the original, won’t be vanishing before her, or even when she dies when her time has come.

_ “Although I'd like to join the crowd _

_ In their enthusiastic cloud _

_ Try as I may, it doesn't last” _

She wanted to be happy for them, she wanted to be happy  _ for him _ , but still, the pain of being unloved by the man she wanted to have, it weighed heavily compared to her joy.

Will she ever smile as she did before? Will she laugh like how she did when she was with him? Will every hand she touched remind her of him or feel lacking? Will every smile she sees make her recall the man who sent her away, refusing to call her by her name?

_ “And will we ever _

_ End up together?” _

Yerenica removed her hand from her mouth, looking up once more to the lonesome moon. The round planet, all alone despite all the stars in the sky, seemed to be weeping and sad. And it felt like she could understand now, that sadness of the pale planet.

_ “No, I think not”  _ she finally amended, smiling sadly to her lonely companion.

_ “It's never to become _

_ For I am not the one” _

Across her balcony, was the emperor she loved and Erudian watched as the helpless and unknowing princess grieved for a love that she thought she never had.

Erudian placed down his wine glass and jumped.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this fic! Merry Christmas!


End file.
